Thursday, May 14, 2015

Conscious Parenting

by Roni Gillenson, LMFT, Program Director of On Campus Counseling Program
As it has been said time and time again that parenting is one of the most challenging jobs.  As we think about how we were raised, what we want to do the same or different in parenting and examine the role models we want to be for our children, we get a clearer picture of the parents we truly want to be.  Needless to say, this is no easy task and takes deep thought, soul searching, bargaining with ourselves, patience, empathy and continually challenging our own values and beliefs.  Just as our partners are not extensions of ourselves (i.e. they can’t read our minds) neither are our children, even though they might look exactly like us when we were kids!  We are their biggest role models.  What we say, how we act – in private and public, how we take care of ourselves – emotionally and physically, how we treat others – family members and friends, is all being watched and, like a video camera, taken in by our children.  The thought of this can be overwhelming!  You might be saying to yourselves, ‘Are you saying I am under a microscope every time I interact with my child, directly and indirectly?  I can’t be perfect!’  Of course you can’t be perfect!  There is no such thing!  We are all human, first and foremost.  However, being the ‘good enough’ parent is the goal here.  Good enough is more than enough!
Donald Winnicott was an English pediatrician and psychoanalyst and probably the first to use the phrase ‘good enough parent’.  He recognized that it was unrealistic to demand perfection of parents, and was interested in finding out what made them ‘good enough’.  He believed that the key to healthy development was rooted in a child’s relationships and interactions with others.
Much of childhood and adolescence is spent testing things out. Kids try out behaviors; teens try out identities. They test their assumptions about the world. If we hold ourselves to a standard of perfection that is unattainable, that sends a message to our kids that making mistakes is not OK. This can make childhood and adolescence an even more stressful and anxiety-filled time. When kids feel there is no room for error, the pressure they place on themselves can be paralyzing and can manifest as anxiety and depression.
When we model for our kids that we try, sometimes fall flat on our faces, and get up and move forward, we help teach them resiliency. When they see us struggle and persevere, we teach them that life may not be easy, but that we have the confidence in ourselves to keep going. When we forgive ourselves and others for falling short, we teach them generosity of spirit and acceptance. When we do all of these things, we teach them that they will be loved based on who they are, not what they achieve.
I believe it begins with you.  

Adolescent Counseling Services is a community non-profit, which provides vital counseling services on nine secondary campuses at no charge to students and their families. To learn more about our services please visit the ACS website at www.acs-teens.org or call Pam Garfield, LCSW Site Director at Gunn High School (650) 849-7919.  ACS relies on the generosity of community members to continue offering individual, family, and group counseling to over 1,500 individuals annually.  ACS provides critical interventions and mental health services, building a better future for tomorrow. If you are interested in helping to support our efforts, do not hesitate to call to make a donation. It goes a long way in helping teenagers find their way!

SELPA 1 CAC Parent Ed

Let's Talk - A chance to ask questions and share ideas, resources, and support with other parents of students with IEPs, 504s, learning differences, mental health challenges, etc.  All are welcome, participants must respect confidentiality.  
Monday June 8, 2015, 7 pm to 9 pm - In the community room of Los Altos Library on San Antonio Road.  Mark your calendars - future meetings will be:  Monday July 13, 10 am to 12 noon, and Monday August 10, 7pm to 9 pm.
Hablemos - Una oportunidad de hacer preguntas y compartir ideas, recursos y apoyo con otros padres de estudiantes con IEP, 504s, diferencias de aprendizaje, problemas de salud mental, etc.Todos son bienvenidos, los participantes deben respetar la confidencialidad.  Será presentado en Inglés.
Lunes 8 Junio, 2015, de 7 pm a 9 pm - en la sala de la comunidad de Los Altos Biblioteca en San Antonio Road.  
For more information see (Para más información) consulte www.selpa1cac.org

This parent education event is sponsored by the SELPA 1 CAC (www.selpa1cac.org) an all-volunteer group of parents of children with special needs.  Our service area includes all public school districts in Los Altos, Mountain View, and Palo Alto.  All of our events are free and open to anyone who feels they might benefit.  No registration is necessary

Hire a String Quartet
Ensembles comprising PACO's most experienced members are available to perform at weddings, parties, get-togethers, and wherever else fine music might be needed.  More info
UPCOMING CONCERTS
Preparatory
May 15th, 7:30PM
Unitarian Universalist

PACO
May 16, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
SuperStrings
May 29, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
Debut
May 30, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
Sinfonia
May 31, 3:00PM
Cubberley Theatre
For a complete list of performances, please visit our website.
CONTACT US
Join Our Mailing List
Palo Alto Chamber Orchestra
Benjamin Simon, Music Director
Katherine Tseung, cello
 
Saturday, May 16th - 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
admission free

A full complement of professional wind and brass players join PACO's string orchestra to perform large orchestral works from the Classical and Romantic repertoire.  Our principal cellist Katherine Tseung, winner of PACO's concerto competition, performs Schumann's heartbreakingly beautiful cello concerto.   An early masterpiece by the incomparable Beethoven, his Symphony No. 2, and the world premiere of a new work written for PACO by Youth-for-Youth Commission winner Thomas Feng round out this program.  
The performance will also feature members of PACO performing movements from the chamber music repertoire, including Smetana's string quartet From My Life and Dvorak's massive G-major quartet.
Concerto Competition Winners with Sinfonia

The remaining winners of PACO's annual Concerto Competition will perform their own concerto movements on May 31st at 3:00PM, joined by the Sinfonia Orchestra.  Join us for pieces by Mozart, Dancla, de Beriot, Barber, and Schumann!

Thursday, May 7, 2015


Hire a String Quartet
Ensembles comprising PACO's most experienced members are available to perform at weddings, parties, get-togethers, and wherever else fine music might be needed.  More info
UPCOMING CONCERTS
Preparatory
May 15th, 7:30PM
Unitarian Universalist

PACO
May 16, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
SuperStrings
May 29, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
Debut
May 30, 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
Sinfonia
May 31, 3:00PM
Cubberley Theatre
For a complete list of performances, please visit our website.
CONTACT US
Join Our Mailing List
Palo Alto Chamber Orchestra
Benjamin Simon, Music Director
Katherine Tseung, cello
 
Saturday, May 16th - 7:30PM
Cubberley Theatre
admission free

A full complement of professional wind and brass players join PACO's string orchestra to perform large orchestral works from the Classical and Romantic repertoire.  Our principal cellist Katherine Tseung, winner of PACO's concerto competition, performs Schumann's heartbreakingly beautiful cello concerto.   An early masterpiece by the incomparable Beethoven, his Symphony No. 2, and the world premiere of a new work written for PACO by Youth-for-Youth Commission winner Thomas Feng round out this program.  
The performance will also feature members of PACO performing movements from the chamber music repertoire, including Smetana's string quartet From My Life and Dvorak's massive G-major quartet.
Concerto Competition Winners with Sinfonia

The remaining winners of PACO's annual Concerto Competition will perform their own concerto movements on May 31st at 3:00PM, joined by the Sinfonia Orchestra.  Join us for pieces by Mozart, Dancla, de Beriot, Barber, and Schumann!